Hell bound

There's the old saying that you learn something new everyday.

Today's lesson for me was that I'm bound for hell. Never mind the good deeds I've done, the way I've lived my life or all the Sundays I've spent in church. Nope, I'm destined to burn, eternally. My damning behavior?

I dared to ask a couple of bible thumpers why so many churches and god fearing people's lives were destroyed by God. A God who'd wielded Hurricane Katrina as a weapon. A weapon with power equal to or greater than the bombs we dropped on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. Prior to their answer I reminded them of their stance regarding the Tsunami from earlier this year.

The response I got: "That is why you're going to hell."

No worries though, I let them know I'd hold the door for them if I got there first.

Posted by phineas g. at 04:00 PM on September 08, 2005 | TrackBack
Comments

That's mighty neighborly of you, Phin. It's good to know we'll have some manners in place down there.

Posted by: Jim at September 8, 2005 05:21 PM

You just know they are going to be there too, because hell is all about punishment, and what could be worse than having to listen to that crap for all eternity?

Posted by: Theresa at September 8, 2005 07:13 PM

**asks in a whisper** please oh please tell me it wasn't my family!!!

Honest to goodness - it sounds like something one of my Daddy's family would say. Probably why I don't even remember their names anymore.

Posted by: Tammi at September 8, 2005 08:05 PM

Ask a stupid question, and you'll get a stupid answer.

The correct answer is, ask Him yourself when you get there.

Now you have something to look forward to. ;-)

Posted by: Vinnie at September 9, 2005 01:01 AM

He's going to kill everyone, whether by myocardial infarction or hurricane or acute hangnail. Everyone you love, everyone you know. You, thee and me. Not only is God beyond my understanding, so is life. Yet I know peace. Do the best you can while you're here, don't worry about the other place till you're there. See you there.

Posted by: Dennis at September 9, 2005 03:35 AM

Don't forget your handbasket!

Posted by: zonker at September 9, 2005 11:27 AM

"Sometimes older and wiser" chiming in. Katrina had the energy of more than a dozen Hiroshima atomic bombs, not one. I've heard megatonnage equilivent estimates ranging up to 15 or more.

When you figure that an area roughly the size of Great Britain has been leveled by the energy equivilent of more than a dozen nuclear warheads, FEMA's response doesn't look quite as crappy, does it? They don't call it a disaster for nothing.

As for those that will burn...

No, the folks going to hell on this one are going to be led by Blanco, Nagin, and Arthur Lawson.

You know Blanco and Nagin and their sins; Lawson is the police chief across the river who's officers shot warning shots over the heads of would-be evacuees to force them back off the bridge and back into New Orleans.

He said, "We did not have the wherewithal to deal with these people.
"If we had opened the bridge, our city would have looked like New Orleans does now: looted, burned and pillaged."

Yup. He's gonna be extra. tasty. crispy.

Posted by: Confederate Yankee at September 9, 2005 01:46 PM

I was gonna nominate you for sainthood yesterday, but I couldn't cuz I read this.

Sorry. You snooze. You freaking lose.

Posted by: sadie at September 9, 2005 04:10 PM

There is no God, no heaven, and no hell. Life and love and disaster and success all happen, without design and without malice. We get one window to be who we're going to be, one chance to find our place, and no one is going to reward or punish us for it.

Nevermind me, I'm just chiming in with the tao-leaning atheist point-of-view.

Posted by: The Minister of Propaganda at September 10, 2005 12:55 PM

You're such a gentleman Phin!

Posted by: Sissy at September 11, 2005 01:36 PM

... I hate it when I die of an acute hangnail.


/TJ

Posted by: TJ at September 12, 2005 05:50 PM