The truth, if it exists...

'tis another Thursday and today's topic for the Demystifying Divas and The Men's Club is three things we'd like to have the oppositely sexed folks out there explain their views on.

Being a rather inquisitive person it took me a while to figure out just three things I wanted to have answered.

First would have to be the unnecessary mutilation and mutations and contortions y'all endure. If y'all really don't want us noticing the twins why do you have them taped / strapped / padded / pulled or otherwise contorted so they're approximately three inches below your chin? Of course we're going to stare at the grand Tetons you've got them prominently on display; it'd be like expecting Rover to completely ignore the mailman as we walks across the front lawn, it's just unnatural. Then there's makeup, granted a bit of makeup may help to enhance natural feature, but by and large most women could do without the war paint. By and large, as with all things, natural is mo' better. Speaking of natural, what the hell are y'all thinking when you pluck / wax / shave / otherwise remove your eyebrows and try to color them in with a magic marker. The "synthetic eyebrow" look isn't become, on the contrary it's down right scary at times and clownish at others.

Second, what the hell is so hard about checking the status of the toilet seat? Ladies it's as much your fault as it is ours; unless there is some genetic mutation that we men are unaware of that prevents women from checking to ensure the seat is in the down and locked position before they plant their delicate derrieres to "make pee-pee"? Maybe there is a genetic deformity, which would also explain why light switches are always left in the up (ON) position as well.

Thirdly all the incessant open ended questions that have no right answer. All the dreaded questions that men we know if we answer them honestly we may as well take a vow of celibacy. "Does this dress / skirt / pantsuit make my ass look fat?" Nope, but the three cheeseburgers and value sized fries you just scoffed down ain't helpin'. Shortly after wild monkey lovin', asking: "So what're you thinking about?" The truth is, it's either nothing 'cause we're about to get some sleep or we're comparing you to your sister that's just a bit more kinky. The list of question is endless, yet they all have the same end result of the lady that's asked it being disappointed. Why, why, why do y'all feel the need to ask these questions, if you're really into pain wouldn't a nice game of slap and tickle be a whole lot more fun and also mutually gratifying?

Stiggy, The Villains, and Jamesy shall be producing questions as well. Nugget is our guest inquisitor this week so see what he has to say as well.

For the ladies perspective, head over and see what Kathy, Silk, and Phoenix have to say. Ms. Sadie says we're on a break, so we'll just have to fondly reminisce of better days (and increase stalking efforts).