A mother's day tribue

Seeing how its mother's day I figured I'd say thanks to my dear mother, who reads this blog on occasion, and let her know that I greatly appreciate everything she's done for me over the years. Most notably choosing not to prematurely ending my time here on earth though the process of a retro-active abortion, even when I truly deserved, and for not selling me off to a band of gypsies even though semi-healthy white babies draw a pretty good price on the black market.

I'd also like to thank the missus, for carrying the phinlet for almost ten months and also not prematurely ending my time here on earth with what the courts would have probably deemed a justifiable homicide. She's truly one of the most amazing women I've ever met and the ordeal that was the phinlet's hatching only solidified this opinion.

Thanks also to the moms out there that offered words of encouragement and praise over the past eleven months. The advice you've given hasn't fallen on deaf ears and is greatly appreciated.

Finally I'd like to personally thank three mothers I've never met and probably never will.

First to the mother of the chicks wearing juicy shorts and bikini tops in the Jeep on Memorial Boulevard yesterday, the world, or at least the older men gawking as they rode by, will forever be grateful to you.

Second to the mother of the chick developing digital pictures at Sam's Club yesterday afternoon. You'll never know the light that your collage aged daughter brought into my life yesterday while she was wearing a mini-skirt and tank top that were made of less material than my t-shirt is. Not to mention the pictures of her drunken friends groping each other and flashing the camera. Warmed my soul she did.

If any of you three young ladies happen to, by chance, stumble upon this blog, please personally thank your mothers for me.

Happy mother's day y'all!