Things President Bush should have said in the State of the Union Address

Any demand for a withdrawal date is as insignificant as it was when Ted Kennedy made it. We’re in Iraq until the job is done. Then we’ll come home.

Mission Accomplished = removing Saddam Hussein from power had been accomplished. Simple enough or should I draw pictures?

We’re still in Japan & Germany does that mean we lost World War II also?

We have begun the invasion of Canada. The 51st – 63rd States are expected to be annexed shortly. Once we have completed the annexation of Canada we will take over Mexico, thus reducing the problems of Illegal immigration and reducing the amount of border we have to protect.

Republicans have control of the house and senate; who cares if the Democrats don’t like my policies, the Democrats have been rendered irrelevant by the American people.

To prevent any further cases of Post Election Selection Trauma I hereby declare myself Emperor of the United States of America.