I suggest a training collar for Ted Kennedy

I'm betting after Teddy's most recent tirade most of the people in Massachusetts wish they had forced him to wear a training collar. I think everyone in America would like to see the day we could withdraw from Iraq. Most rational people, those who aren’t pickled and get their jollies by driving off bridges, would agree that it is impossible to give a number of days until Iraq will be completely self sufficient. That would be like demanding to know the exact date and time Teddy will be sober again, it just isn’t going to happen without divine intervention.
Maybe instead of focusing on areas outside of his expertise Teddy should chair a new committee on how to prevent drunken driving, or maybe he could at least give us firm dates on when every American will have health insurance and issue he considers almost as important as fixing another drink.