Communication breakdown

What we have here is a failure to communicate.

I have one customer at work that I'm unable to communicate with. He's the one client that invokes the full wrath of my Tourette's Syndrome. The bad part, he's about like Ward Cleaver. The nicest guy you've ever met and timid as a church mouse.

Our conversations are always on the brief side or riddled with him being placed on hold so I can take a deep breath, scream and slam my head against the desk a couple of times only to pick the phone up again and fight back the profanities.

Hell he even used the phrase "Gosh Golly" earlier today and then apologized for his rough language and paused as he placed a couple of dollars in their "Swear Jar". What the hell, Swear Jar??? All the while I'm fighting back the urge to let loose a string of profanities that would make the most seasoned sailor blush.

The bad part is I'm not quite sure what it is about the guy that makes my language so "colorful". The great news is during our most recent conversation he's mentioned working on-site with them for a couple of days. As in 18 - 20 hours in a 48 hour time period where I'd be shelling out more cash than a strip joint ATM. This may be the first consulting trip ever where it's ended up costing me money.

Damn.