Iraq's first vote in over 50 years a success!

Inital reports show 72 percent of those eligible to cast ballots did so. Wait that has to be a typo, nope I checked, double checked, and even went back a third time. For a land that had the will of America pushed on it the Iraqi’s seemed to respond very well. Maybe American’s should have some of their own will pushed upon themselves since our highest voter turn out was 63 percent back in 1960.

After the results of the Iraqi elections are finalized I’m waiting on John Kerry, Barbra Boxer and Teddy Kennedy to demand answers to the following three questions:
1) Were the people voting actually U.S. Troops dressed as Iraqi’s?
2) Where was the Bloodbath that was projected to take place on Election Day in Iraq?
3) Is there a place for them in Iraq’s political arena since they’ve worn out their welcome in America?

• Update: The percentage of voters has been lowered to 60%

I suggest a training collar for Ted Kennedy

I'm betting after Teddy's most recent tirade most of the people in Massachusetts wish they had forced him to wear a training collar. I think everyone in America would like to see the day we could withdraw from Iraq. Most rational people, those who aren’t pickled and get their jollies by driving off bridges, would agree that it is impossible to give a number of days until Iraq will be completely self sufficient. That would be like demanding to know the exact date and time Teddy will be sober again, it just isn’t going to happen without divine intervention.
Maybe instead of focusing on areas outside of his expertise Teddy should chair a new committee on how to prevent drunken driving, or maybe he could at least give us firm dates on when every American will have health insurance and issue he considers almost as important as fixing another drink.

Censor the Media!!!!!!!

I'm starting to long for the good ole days when body counts of our troops were not major focus of the major news outlets. It is not entirely the fault of the left wing media, as the conservative government has given them access to a war zone. But what good is the constant stream of American solders death doing for anyone other than to boost the terrorists moral?

1/27/05: Iraq Violence Kills 12; Baghdad Gun Battles
1/26/05: Deadliest day for U.S. in Iraq War
1/26/05: Father: Son killed in crash was due home soon

I could keep listing the daily reports coming out of Iraq but if you found this page you can obviously search Al Gore’s invention.

None of the media outlets are not reporting the positive aspects of what is going on in Iraq. You've got to look pretty hard to find an article such as the one on World Tribune.com that says anything remotely positive.

Not that I'm cynical or anything, but it is starting to look like the media is pulling for the insurgency. The media receives anonymous tips about where a “demonstration” is going to take place; and then wow a terrorist kills somebody. Who could see that coming? If the “reporters” and “photographers” have not figured it out by now they need to get the hell out of Iraq; I’m not sure they have enough sense to live much longer without constant supervision (they’ve got to have T.G.I.F. written on their shoes).

The world in my humble opinion would be a much happier and safer place if the constant flow of media out of a war zone were to stop. Think about it for a second: The Terrorists would only be inflicting minor casualties without the constant ego boost they receive by seeing themselves on the news. The U.S. Troops could carry out interrogations as needed without being demonized by the very people it is trying to protect.

Note to Democrats: T.G.I.F. = Toes Go In First

No more blue light?

To hell with Corporate Americana and to hell with K-Mart. They've decided the blue light special is gone for good. Attention K-Mart shoppers, we should no longer cling to the hopes of hearing those three famous words again.

He's dead, just kiddin'

EMT's declared a Larry Green dead two hours after he was hit by a car. When his injuries were being documented by the Medical Examiner she noticed he was still breathing (How'd the EMT's miss that part?). It would have been a whole lot cooler if he had asked for a drink.

He's just Festively Pump

So there are several states that feel getting rid of physical education is a good idea. The education boards may want to take a look at the picture below prior to getting rid of the programs.

When this has become the norm rather than the exception we've got a big problem on our hands, no pun intended.

I used to like SPAM.

I just finished changing my e-mail address at work again. I was receiving too much Spam. I used to like spam.

But then it started being delivered via e-mail, instead of in a Square Tin Container. I find that the spam printed out on paper isn’t nearly as tasty as the chicken, beef and pork byproducts. So I want to go back to the good old days when the only spam I received was in a Square Tin Container.

The other reason i changed my address is the Feds had tapped that e-mail account, so I’m being clever and changing it.

They’ll never be able to figure out that it’s still me, NEVER I SAY.

Now if you'll pardon the dust and noise I've got a bit of remodeling to do. Oh and this would be the official: Hear I Bee! post for phin's blog, so if you would be please pardon the dust while I get things settled.