An easier way.....

After reading my Link Tips post at The Alliance basil of basil's blog has come up with an alternative for adding target="_blank" to every link you add.

basil explains on how to set the default target so your links open in new windows / tabs by default.

The change has been made here and I'm greatly appreciated for the tip, as it makes blogging easier.

Thanks basil!

Update: When using MT there are a couple of places target="_self". The main places are the pemalinks. To keep a new window from popping up when you submit a comment add target="_self" to the <form method="post".... line on the individual template.

The first daughters

The recent picture below of Chelsea is spreading across in the internet and blogidohexiweb faster than crabs in a sorority house. Progressives are pointing out that Chelsea is now an attractive young woman.

I see your president's daughter.
And....

I raise you twins:

Sure looks aren't everything, the wingnuts got the moonbats out numbered too!

Happenin's at The Alliance

Since I'm slack and haven't been linking back to The Alliance Headquarters I figured now's as good a time as any to start.

This week's round up:
New Precision Guided Humor (PGH): What would the internet be like if it were run by the UN?
And the PGH Roundup.

There is also a post on Blogger Etiquette, some people may want to check out.

Here kitty, kitty, kitty....

'tis Thursday and time to cover another topic. This week’s topic: What pets will tell you about a date.

Growing up I had a various assortment of pets, fishes (imagine that???), cats and dogs. The missus also had a wide array of pets. Currently our household contains cats and a dog. The cats are the wife's and are constantly plotting against me (evil and manipulative little creatures they are). The dog is ours but favors who ever has food at that moment. The puppy doesn't roam the house freely; but she does have more to do with the decision making processes than I do.

As far as pets and potential dates when was "in the game" I wasn't overly concerned about the types of pets a date had. Unless it was a pet spider, I hate spiders. Now quantity is a whole different story, the people with hundreds of animals roaming inside of their homes need extensive therapy and beatings with a rubber hose and shouldn't be considered potential mates. Hell they shouldn't be allowed to breed.

This topic also reminded me of the joke:

Facts about cats:
1) Cats do what they want.
2) They rarely listen to you.
3) They're totally unpredictable.
4) They whine when they are not happy.
5) When you want to play, they want to be alone.
6) When you want to be alone, they want to play.
7) They expect you to cater to their every whim.
8) They're moody.
9) They leave hair everywhere.
10) They drive you nuts and cost an arm and a leg.

Conclusion: They're tiny little women in cheap fur coats.

Should things progress and your date wants to bring their pet into the game run.
Don't stop to think about it, just run. Run like the wind. Sure you may think that the Llamas are smart, cute and cuddly creatures; however I promise you, dating a Llama will bring nothing but heartache and they’ll make a mess of the place if the get their hooves on the keys to your pad.

Yep you guessed it I drew a blank on this one.
No formidable insight, except if you aren’t an animal person you shouldn’t date / marry an animal person.

For testosterone laden points of view visit: Our Maximum Leader, The Wizard and Stiggy.

The guest diva man for the week is the tincanman.

For estrogen laden points of view: Chrissy, Silk and Sadie have posted. Kathy will probably post as soon as she finishes chasterating (new form of punishment) a LLama.

A death wish????

It seems that a certain LLama has a death wish.

At least that's the only thing I can think of to explain this, this and 'specially this.

Something wrong with the world today...

On my drive to work I was flipping through the radio stations. I found a song I liked and left it there. When the morning show hosts came back on the air I heard one of the hosts offer a solution to one of their callers. A solution that proves there's something dreadfully wrong with the world today.

See this caller's problem is that she is in a relationship with a man that doesn't want to be married or have children. They, the caller and her boyfriend, are both divorced and have children from a previous marriage. The caller however wants to get married right away and wants to start a second family with the one true love for her.

That's when one of the co-hosts suggests that she stop using birth control medication. In the hostesses little world the woman calling in would get pregnant and the boyfriend would change his mind, they'd get married and live happily ever after. She was truly offering this advice to the woman on the radio, and thusly offering it to anyone listening as a solution to their problems.

Now I realize and you realize that the advice she's offering is a load of crap. However to somebody ignorant to call a morning show for advice the little voice coming through their speakers is the gospel. We realize that the whole situation could and probably will blow up in her face. She and several other people that called in didn't see a problem with the hostesses' solution and offered other solutions from prior experience.

There's something wrong with the world today folks. The biggest problem I see is that not only are stupid people allowed to breed; it's also that they're out breeding those of us with good sense.

Improvements in Hell

With the number of Lawyers & Lawyers to be that I read on a daily basis I had to post this:

An engineer died and ended up in Hell. He was not pleased with the level of comfort in Hell, and began to redesign and build improvements. After awhile, they had toilets that flush, air conditioning, and escalators. Everyone grew very fond of him.

One day God called to Satan to mock him, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?"

Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."

God was surprised, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake. He should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up
here."

"No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer, and I'm keeping him."

God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!"

Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

Travel Blegging

I shall be traveling to grand ole Las Vegas for a couple of days next week on business. ('tis a rough life but somebody has to do it).
It's been a couple of years since my last trip out to the desert.
Are there any new attractions that I shouldn't miss?

Well other than the new lineup of entertainers at the Cheetah Club.
Or should I just plan on spending my free time at the poker tables?

Unsurprised and unimpressed

I really wished I was surprised by the comment Evil Glenn® of It's a Pundit received on this post regarding Catherine Baker Knoll today.

How somebody actually has the backbone to blame the family, not Ms. Knoll for her comments is beyond me. Well I guess I can't call it backbone since they didn't since they posted with a non-existent web address and probably a fake e-mail address as well.

So I'll pose this question to the general blogidohexiweb: If Catherine Knoll wasn't hoping for the support of the slain veteran’s family why would she make the statement that "Our Government" wasn't supporting the war to them?

I hope they both catch the clap and that their nether regions are infested with the fleas from a thousand rabid gophers.

Me a geek???

Who'd a thunk it???

Hat Tip: The LLamas & Kathy.

Update: After informing the missus of my score she replied: "You would that since you spent five and half years getting a degree in Computer Science you'd have done a bit better."

A Villainous Task

The Naked Villains have been made over. Well the villains themselves didn't under go rapid transformations, but nakedvillainy.com did.

Gone to take a look-see yet?

Go ahead, I'll wait......

Impressive isn't it?
But would you expect any less from Apothegm Designs?

Medical notes

The cute young lady administering your CT Scan will not hold your hand when you try to convince her you suffer from closterphobia. She will however offer you a couple of valium if you do a good job of convincing.

Side note #1: Blogging may be a bit more delusional than normal.
Side note #2: Closterphobia is the fear of confined spaces; not the terrible fear of kitten posters I’ve been trying to overcome. Who knew????

The WaPo strikes again...

The Roberts just can't get anything right, at least in the minds words of the moonbats extraordinaire. The demonizing of the Roberts family has begun " ...Jack -- having freed himself from the controlling grip of his mother -- enjoying a moment in the spotlight...". But that's about as cognitive a thought as Robin Givhan was able to choke out in her article that is reminiscent of notes passed between prepubescent girls in grade school.

The topic of her post: SCOTUS Nominee John Roberts' family and their attire. The picture of the Roberts family and President Bush is captioned with "Even the clothes are conservative". Ah yes the old tactic of when in doubt attack the person....'s family....'s clothes.

If the best the Liberal Media's crack staff of reports is able to come up with is slander of apparel then there shouldn't be any problem getting John Roberts approved.

Hat Tip: trying to grok

RINO Sightings

For loads of good reading: this week's edition of RINO Sightings is being hosted by The Countertop Chronicles.

Random travel thoughts

Below is an amalgamation of observations and things I learned as I flew up and down the eastern seaboard yesterday (from North Carolina to Pennsylvania and back home to North Carolina again).

Fourteen hours of one day in airports and airplanes isn’t very much fun when you're traveling alone.

When you have six flights the chances are at least one of the piolets will bounce the plane of the run way.

Rough landings work almost as well as a chiropractor's visit for loosening up a stiff back, until you try to get out of bed the next day.

There is a dress code that requires all females under the age of twenty-one to wear a tank top and shorty shorts. Exceptions to this rule should be made. For example if the shorts your going to wear, that don't cover your butt cheeks and are made of less material than the sails on the USS Constitution, maybe you shouldn't wear them in public (or allow your friend / daughter to).

Treating the airline employees at the ticket counter with kindness, instead of like servants, will brighten everybody's day. Actually talking to the ticket counter employees about something other than your trip can get you upgraded or moved to a better seat. Acting like an putz and complaining to / blaming the employees for problems our of their hands can get you bumped from the flight or a seat in the back of the plane.

John Gibson lied when he said the airways and transit systems in the United States hadn't been affected by the most recent terror attacks.

With enough smiling and playful banter it is possible to convince the cute young lady sitting beside you to hold your hand during take off, you know because this is your first time flying (leave out the at 6:29 to whatever location bit if you travel quite a bit).

Even the mention of explosives in your luggage will result in you being presented with a set of sparkly new bracelets. The guy that gives them to you isn't very gentle, they fit snug, and you'll probably miss your flight home. (Yes I actually saw this take place yesterday. I pointed and laughed at him. He seemed rather miffed by my finding amusement in his pain, I didn't care.)

When the stewardess says "If there's anything I can do to make your flight more enjoyable" spankings aren't part of the anything she'll do. Full body massages aren't in the game plan either. A lingerie clad pillow fight with the other cute stewardess is apparently against FAA regulations, otherwise she said have been all for it. She will however be happy to grab you a pillow; Just make sure she doesn't try to hold it over your face, for too long, when she brings it back.

When somebody sitting beside you closes their eyes it doesn't mean they want you to keep telling them your entire life story. They're probably plotting ways to make your life story shorter should they ever encounger you on an airplane again. Grown women don't find it humorous when you ask them if they want to play the quiet game, those sitting around you may.

Update: I'll probably be picking up one of these shirts for my next trip. (hattip: Confederate Yankee)

Birthday Wishes

It's Mustang 23 of Assumption of Command is a year older today! Go say happy birthday.

While you're at it blogroll him or send him cake or pie or pictures of hot young lingerie clad ladies pillow fighting, just make sure you carbon copy me if you send the pictures.

You said what??????

This week's topic for the Men's club and the Divas is: Most embarrassing dating moments and how to avoid them.

I once again had trouble with this topic; mainly because it really takes quite a bit to embarrass me. However as I looked back over my dating past there were several moments I remembered that I should probably be embarrassed by or at least ashamed of. Not surprising a majority of these moments had to do with the impaired judgment that goes hand in hand with having a few too many drinks.

First and foremost is hitting on the bartender. Sure she's going to flirt right back as you're tipping five bucks for a two dollar beer. I can however promise you that 99% of the time she isn't going to give her phone number out to a guy that manages to down a fifth of liquor by himself in one night. Thus it's best to save your pickup lines for the chick that keeps getting hotter as the night wears on. You know the one dancing alone beside the pool tables.

As the old song goes: Last night I went to bed at two with a ten, and at ten I woke up with a two... Just a hint, if you're going to have a one night stand, make sure:
a) your friends don't see the other participant if he / she is below par
b) that you come home wearing the same thing so you can at least deny anything happened. If you come home minus clothing it's hard to claim we just "talked"; and you can bet your friends will give you hell for hooking up with somebody that's homely.
c) that you see your "target" sober so your beer goggles don't interfere with good judgment.

There's also the embarasing, when is the right time kiss someone for the first time. Try to kiss her too soon and she'll turn her head and you're kissing cheek. Wait too long and she's telling all her girl friends you're gay. To avoid this I always went for smokers. See I was a smoker so when I was on the market the added smoke flavoring didn't bother me and I figured if she was willing to stick a nasty ass cigarette in her mouth she probably won't mind kissing me good night.

The final embarrassing moment, which I inevitably encountered, was me opening my big mouth and saying the wrong thing. Not sure if y'all have noticed it or not but I'm a tad bit of a smart ass, just a tad mind you. One particular instance comes to mind. An ex-girlfriend and I were watching Tee Vee. I made a comment about the show she snippily responded. Never one to be out done I replied: "When I want lip out of you, I'll rattle my zipper". For some reason she wasn't as amused as I was. Needless to say the relationship went downhill from there. The remedy for this was for me to learn to keep my big yap shut, when I finally met the right one.

Note: I haven't done this one but I saw it happened and laughed accordingly.
The over protective bit is way over rated; don't make an ass out of yourself in public trying to be big and bad. I promise there's always somebody bigger and meaner. When you get overly jealous and he kicks your ass you'll just end up looking like an even bigger idiot when she leaves with her new "friend".

For more enlightened views: The Naked Villains, The Wizard and Stiggy shall provide manly perspectives. While Sadie, Silk, Kathy, Chrissy and Michele provide the feminine point of view.

A work related question

Does work ever interfere with anybody else's ability to blog properly?

Who the hell do those people in the front office think they are anyhow?

Sure they sign the paychecks but does that really give them the power to dictate how I spend my time while I'm at the office?

Me thinks it may be time for a rebellion!!!!!!

Something to waste time ???

I've always known the world was against me, I just never knew the folks at google were in on it also.

Yet when you do a google search for: something to waste time, who's number one???

Who? It's phin.
That's right scream my name!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
phin's blog is number one on google's list of things to waste time.

Neighbors helping neighbors

The aftermath and cleanup of Hurricane Dennis is just getting started. One of Dan Riehl's long time readers has been affected by the flooding and needs a hand. If you're thinking something like this won't happen to you think again.

I've seen the damage that can stem from back to back hurricanes, in 1999 we watched as new records were set and the 500 year flood plane was reevaluated. Home owners that could not purchase flood insurance watched as their homes were washed off of their foundations. As an inhabitant of the North Carolina coastal area the people affected by the hurricanes have my undying sympathy.

So if you can do something do it. If you think it can't and won't happen to you, well you're dead wrong.

Birthday wishes

When I went to bed last night I had figured my wife would be the first to wish me a happy birthday. Boy howdy was I wrong. The first one with greetings this morning, my seventy pound boxer:

She normally sleeps in a carrier / kennel, it's been routine for the past three years. Well this morning around four o'clock she decided she wanted to visit with the wife and I. We awoke to the carrier door dropping back shut and the sound of a seventy pound beast running though the house. She ran back to the bedroom, once I hoped out of be she headed towards the living room. I found her in my recliner, sitting and waiting patiently for me.

She walked back to her carrier, when I lifted the gate she walked inside and laid down happy and content, with a smug look of achievement on her face. I returned to bed where a giggling wife who then wished me a happy birthday.

Twenty minutes later, sensing that I'd just gotten back to sleep, the beast struck again. She'd apparently figured out that she could slam her nose into the bottom of the kennel door and it would bow just enough to pop open. This time she was at a dead run towards the bedroom, being lead and trailed by the wife's now terrified cats.

This time I popped her on the tail a couple of times and she trotted back to the kitchen; after being let outside to run around the yard a couple of times she was ready to go back to bed. In her kennel she laid down to sleep the rest of the morning. When I got back to the bedroom the wife was still amused since the cats, now scared witless, had decided my side of their bed was safe refuge.

Damned animals, I think they're plotting against me. 'tis rough being out smarted by a three year old boxer on your thirtieth birthday. Oh well, I can honestly say that my thirtieth birthday shall be one to remember.

RINO Sightings

This week's edition of RINO Sightings is being hosted by The World Wide Rant.
Step on over and check it out.

Outed

I had originally planned to keep my turning 1E (Hex) tomorrow quiet; well as quiet as possible anyhow. I'm still a teen by some standards (we aren't discussing my mental capacity, that's still in the single digits).

It seems however that my older and sometimes wiser brother and the queen of feistiness have ensured this special day doesn't pass without recognition. So yes for all of you who feel the ominous overtones of tomorrow 'tis nothing to worry about it's just me turning 00011110 (Binary).

Yes I am vain enough that I would make you click this link to determine my age if you aren't sure what the conversions are.

Reminds me of one of my favorite jokes: There are 10 types of people in this world, those who can read binary and those who can't.

Why go to a strip joint??

I'm ranked number three right now for google searches of why go to a strip joint.

I'm not real sure why somebody would search the web for why go to a strip joint. The answer is pretty obvious; we're there to meet nice wholesome young ladies who we're hoping are our future wives / mothers of our children and to talk about the weather.

We definitely aren't going to ogle the women; that would be just rude and demeaning to all women right?????

Denigrate The Overblog 2005

Space Monkey has the 2nd Annual Denigrate The Overblog festival running at his place.

Nothing says wholesome like nice good clean denigration does it?

Don't be a reject...

'tis time to cover another topic with the demystifying divas and the Men's club. This week's topic: how to avoid romantic based rejection and how to recuperate when you've been rejected.

Being rejected stings. Well depending upon the situation it can do a bit more than sting. For example being shot down when using an extremely horrid pickup line: "Hey darlin' you wanna go in halves on a bastard?" Isn't nearly as painful as say meeting your wife's new lover, who also happens to be your best friend's sister.

Just imagine the get barbeques after such an incident, "Hey aren't you they guy that Frank's little sister is dating now? Man that's got suck. So what'd you do to turn your wife into a lesbian?" There really isn't another scenario that deals such a crushing blow to a man's ego, except maybe if she became a nun and explained that you'd ruined sex for her completely.

When meeting women there are a several ways guys typically try to minimize the sting of being rejected. The most well known method is the use of pick up lines. At this point in time the women reading this are saying recalling all the times some poor sap walked up to them and said "Was your father a thief? 'Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes." It's lines like these that some men resort to as ice breakers.

The way they look at it, is if you're willing to laugh of an appalling introduction you'll probably let us down easy when we finally work up the nerve to ask for your phone number. If you blow us off completely, well then we can chalk up your crassness to your lack of a sense of humor and we wouldn't want to waste our precious limited time anyhoo.

I promise you ladies we men aren't as stupid as we look, okay some of us are, but by in large we aren't. We know that you're a fierce lot and that your instincts to protect your young (born or unborn) can and does make y'all. We're just trying to soften the blow when we learn that you wouldn't even consider us as a potential mate (or playmate as the case may be).

After being turned down we'll there are several steps towards the road of repairing our damaged ego.
The first is to order another round of refreshing adult beverages.
Next we'll swear the lady that turned us down is:
a) Already engaged / married / in a committed relationship.
b) A hateful hussy we'd prefer not to spend any time around.
c) A lesbian.
d) ALL OF THE ABOVE.

Nine times out of ten we'll opt for answer d and swear all the ladies in the group of are from the lesbian convent just down the road. This helps to save our fragile egos since there really can't be anything wrong with us can there? Once we've convinced ourselves that it's you and not us we'll move along to the next unsuspecting victim.

Our methods of avoiding rejection once we're in a relationship go even further. We'll end a relationship / fail to pursue a relationship over the most insignificant reasons. She's got a mole on her right shoulder, holds the fork funny, snorts when she laughs, etc... the reasons men have ended relationships are as numerous as the days of the earth. Some of them may be valid phobias, however often times I've seen guys try to end a relationship prior to being dropped. If they sense things aren't going so well, zip, bang, pow, see ya darlin'. Its been real, its been fun, but it hasn't been real fun.

Primarily it all boils down to our fragile egos again. The blow seems to be less crushing if we end the relationship by finding a fault, no mater how insignificant in the other person.

Now should we be captured by surprise and dropped prior to being able to end the relationship ourselves there are a series of steps that we go through to recover. The first involves mentally torturing ourselves for about fifteen minutes until we realize it was your fault and that you really weren't worthy of us to start with. From there we call our college buddies, who are required by The Guy Code to take us out drinking as step two in the recover process.

While out drinking all the guys will take turns swearing how she was never "the right one"; never mind that just two days earlier they were swearing she was the greatest thing since canned peaches. Once there has been adequate ex-bashing it's time to start down the true road of recovery with means you've got to get "back in the game". If the friends are married, this will typically involve a trip to the nearest gentlemen's establishment so the kind young ladies can reassure your buddies you that they're you're still desirable. If they're all single, this will typically involve a trip to the nearest gentlemen's establishment so the kind young ladies can reassure your buddies you that they're you're desirable. (Catching a theme here?)

Once the customary trip to Bottoms Up is out of the way it's time to start over with the steps mentioned in how to avoid rejection when meeting women. It really is a vicious cycle isn't it? Makes me happy I'm happily married (at least the wife keeps telling me I'm happily married).

The Wizard, the Naked Villains and Stiggy are offering mo' better masculine points of view.

Kathy,Silk, Sadie and Phoenix are providing female prospectives. Chrissy isn't feeling so hot and may post tomorrow.

This one's for Bill...

Since Bill of INDC Journal tends to get a bit cranky when he doesn't get to see Robbo the LLama Butcher "dressed", so I figured I'd post his fix.

Who knew

Who knew the Goddess of Snark was also Queen of the Guilt Trip?

Kathy has information on Type I (Juvenile) Diabetes, a great cause we should all be supporting. So instead of showering me with gifts for my birthday next week make a donation.

Why we're fighting....

For those who wonder why we are still in Afghanistan it's to ensure the villages filled with honorable people, like this village that saved the life of a Navy SEAL, don't fall victim to the Taliban once again.

I'm surprised after the recent attacks against our brethren in London that people are forgetting these words: "all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness". If you are sure where they came from; they're from the United States of America's Declaration of Independence (full version here).

Maybe I'm reading too much into it; however I feel that all people regardless of their geographical location are entitled to these rights. War isn't pretty, it never has been. Unless we win the war on terror and spread democracy world wide we will never be able to return to our way of life prior to September 11th, 2001. I am thankful everyday that we have an administration in office with the same view and the gumption to continue the spread of democracy.

It's only been eight days since we celebrated our Independence, shouldn't everyone have the opportunity to do the same?

Hat Tip: INDC Journal

Mo' happenin's

It looks like somebody is moving up in the world. Or at least getting to post in various places around the Blogdodecaheciweb.

HBS #XXVIII : Winning the war on terror

I've been slack when it comes to participation in the Homespun Blogger Symposiums. July 8th's question:

This week saw terrorism raise it's ugly head in London killing more than 50 people, wounding over 700.

Based on this recent attack...do you feel that we're winning, losing, or holding our own in fighting the Global War on Terrorism (GWOT)? (Hint: The answer may be none of the above.)

There has never been a viable alternative to fighting the war on terror. We can not follow in the footsteps of others and cower behind the skirts of other countries. If we can not depend up ourselves to rid the world of terror who can we depend upon?

basil mentioned there are several fronts to the war on terror. We can not afford to follow the path the Deans, Kerrys and Kennedys would lead us down; lest all the gains we have made in the war on terror would be for naught. So far the terrorists training grounds in Afghanistan have been destroyed and emptied. Many terrorists have been captured, killed or are on the run. Bin Laden is now an impotent little man on the run, he's no long the daunting fear inducing character of 2001.

Yes we are winning the war on terror. Had Bin Laden's dreams been carried out the United States of America would have crumbled into disarray and we would be begging for the terrorist to stop their attacks. Instead the Taliban has been reduced to a group of lying cowards (Hat Tip: The Jawa Report). Bin Laden is on the run and may be dead. And the terrorist Saddam Hussein has been removed from power and will be held accountable for his actions.

For those of you who may question whether or not Saddam Hussein is a terrorist. Terrorism Defined: All criminal acts directed against a State and intended or calculated to create a state of terror in the minds of particular persons or a group of persons or the general public. So when as he and his henchmen murdered, raped and tortured the innocent people of Iraq they were committing acts of terrorism.

Yes we are winning the war on terror. Instead of crumbling and screaming for a change of leadership we have kept the leaders in place who will not allow our great nation and it's people to fall. Instead of pointing fingers and placing blame we rallied behind our leaders and have stood beside our allies in their darkest moments. Instead of depending upon others to rid the world of threats to our homelands we have taken the fight to our threats and won't stop until they have been removed.

As basil said:

We're winning the War on Terror, because we cannot afford to lose it. We didn't ask for this war. We didn't want this war. We don't want to have to fight this or any war. But it was brought to our shores. And we will fight this war. And we will win it.

For those who feel finding an alternative to oil is the solution answer this: What is the Middle East going to do once their only marketable product has been replaced? Yes we are dependant upon oil; however the Middle East is also dependant upon us. Once an alternative has been found how long will it take for the wide spread poverty that plagues Africa to reach the Middle East? If you think the Middle East is a Terrorist breading ground now, what would happen if the world wasn't pumping billions of dollars into their economy?

An alternative fuel source must be found as there is a limited supply of oil. During this time we must also eradicate the extremists that would do us harm, teach the affected populations how to fend for themselves by helping them find other marketable solutions and spread democracy to allow these changes.

Yes we are winning the war on terror, it isn't pretty and there is a long road to go. We can only hope and pray that our leadership will continue to take the fight to the terrorists instead of waiting until they bring the fight to us.

RINO Sightings

Larry of Inside Larry's Head has posted RINO Sightings III; Revenge of the RINO.

Them boys are mean

I was shocked and appalled to learn that The Naked Villains have gathered at the Smallholder's Farm to celebreate the Christening of the Wee Smallholder. What an odd reason to celebrate and just how mean and sadistic can a group of grown men be?

I am truly concerned about our society when a group of families comes together to celebrate someone breaking a bottle of Champaign over a child's head.

You're all sick and mean.

update: Nevermind what I just said, mrs. phin just informed me that the Christening of a child does not involve the breaking of a Champaign bottle over the brow of a child.

And so it begins.

With the launch of The LLama Butchers new design Sadie and I are announcing a partnership, Apothegm Designs. Following will be announcements of the web site, with portfolios, services we're willing to perform and the prices of said services. If you're a bit curious before then please feel free to send us an e-mail.

If you'd like to see a couple of the other sites we've done you can take a look around Feisty Repartee (where Sadie demonstrates her exquisite skinning skills) and Confederate Yankee (by me).

More details will be posted as they become available.

'tis IMAO's blogiversary

Yep today is IMAO's 3rd Anniversary.

An impressive feat to say the least. In the past three years the blogidodeheisweb has seen great talents rise and fall, amazingly Frank J. & IMAO have managed to survive (in spite of himself many may say). I for one feel its Frank J.'s complete and total lack of self awareness that has helped to propel him to the top, that and his undying love for Monkeys and Kittens.

Some say behind every good man is a good woman, luckily Frank J. didn't know his limits and managed to con SarahK into marrying him. Hopefully SarahK won't realize until its to late that Aquaman is the true driving force behind IMAO.

Happy Birthday to IMAO and congratulations to blogidodeheisweb's Boxer Bedecked Overlord: Frank J.

Note: This has nothing to do with the Alliance's request for Mischeif, nope nothing at all.

Jealousy

'tis the time to cover another topic with the Men's Club and the Demystifying Divas. This week's topic: Jealousy, the green eyed monster.

I'll be honest with y'all folks I had trouble with this topic. I'm not a jealous person, never have been. I talked to the Wife about it a bit and her view point is if somebody else is willing to put up with my crap they can have me (for some reason she thinks I'm hard to get along with, like she knows anything about that).

Now I can say that my lack of jealousy has gotten me into a bit of trouble. I was dating a girl in college, prior to meeting the Wife, and after a couple of drinks she thought it would be cute to see my reaction when she said she was going to drop me for my best friend. My reaction: "Sweet! If he's willing to put up with your silly ass I won't have to drive you home and I'll have somebody to talk to about that thing you do with your tongue".

Game. Set. Match.

Maybe I shouldn't have been so enthusiastic or at least waited until we weren't in public to take the wind out of her sails. She was pissed to say the least. She couldn't comprehend why I wasn't the least bit concerned and upset that she was talking about leaving me. She was even more upset that I'd just blissfully allow my best friend to take her from me. And she was starting to go ballistic because I'd busted her bubble in public.

The Wife and I have discussed jealousy at various times throughout our relationship. She's told me she isn't concerned about me cheating, that she has complete faith and trust in me. She also said just in case I ever do feel like wondering astray to keep in mind that she will remove my whozits, bare handed.

See folks it's all about trust (and fear).

The Wizard, Puffy, The Naked Villains, Chrissy, Sadie, Kathy and Silk along with Joan of Seven Inches of Sense have all voiced their opinions on Jealousy.

A wakeup call from hell

I woke this morning to the news that the Secret Group of al Qaeda's Jihad in Europe had claimed responsibility for the blasts in London this morning.

If there have ever been any doubts as to why we must not end the war on terror until we have eradicated it this should remove them.

If those on the far left calling for a withdrawal date from Afghanistan and Iraq want to know why we'll stay until the job is done this is why.

Our kinsman in England have stood beside us in the war on terror, let us now get down in the trenches and pull them back up in their time of need. They were here for us when we were attacked on in our homes, now the time has come for us to return the favor.

We can not allow anyone to allow bestow the blame upon us for this attack as we continue to fight the war on terror and we can ill afford to allow our kinsman in the war on terror to follow in the footsteps of those who have buckled under the demands of terrorists.

If you needed a reminder as to why we're fighting the war on terror, you just got it. We can not afford to to allow those who have died to die in vain.

Definitions by example #2

Verbal Castration: The removal of someone's whozits without tools or physical violence, often imploring the use of strong language and threats to one's 'nads, resulting in severe shrinkage and hibernation of the male reproductive organs.

Used in a sentence: phin was verbally castrated by the axis of evil when they learned he referred to them as the axis of evil, therefore he will no longer call the axis of evil the axis of evil and shall refer too them individually as Adolf, Benito and Hirohito.

Definitions by example

Demasculinated: being refered to as one of the girls by your 19 year old sister-in-law.

Used in a sentence: phin was demasculinated yesterday when his sister-in-law referred to him as one of the girls as he chauffeured the axis of evil (the wife and her two sisters) to the mall.

The unanimous Declaration

IN CONGRESS, JULY 4, 1776
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America

Click to Enlarge

I've wondered at times if our forefathers knew the greatness we would achieve and trials and tribulations our nation would undergo in the years since they signed our Declaration of Independence. In our brief history our country has defended itself from all attackers emerging as a stronger more united nation.

There are and always have been those who feel the country should be in heading in a different direction. Only through healthy debate are we able to learn and grow and see all sides of the issues at hand. These different perspectives have allowed our great nation to grow and prosper as the world changes around us and as we change the world. However there are times when it is necessary for us to put our differences aside and take care of the task at hand.

By putting our differences aside we have liberated countries.
By putting our differences aside we have delivered entire continents from the grasp of evil.
By putting our differences aside we have become and shall remain a super power for the world to respect and rely on.

This Fourth of July as you spend time with your friends and family please take a couple of minutes to reflect and say thanks to the sacrifices others have made for our way of life. Take the time to thank someone in our armed forces for protecting our way of life and for helping to spread democracy world wide. Take the time to reflect on what it truly means to be an American.

May all of you have a happy and safe Fourth of July.

Cross posted at Confederate Yankee

Certifiable

I saw it first when our Maximum Leader took a personality disorder quiz. and posted his results. At the time I laughed and went along on my merry minion way; I figured it was jut another quiz where everybody was crazy.

Then I saw it again when sadie posted her results. She isn't nearly as crazy as I had expected.

Then I see that silk's posted her scores and I think she took the wrong test or copied sadie's answers. I'm not saying which *cough* Obsessive-Compulsive *cough* disorder she exhibits on a daily basis.

And again when the Minister of Propaganda posted his results. I'm 99.9% sure he had somebody take the test for him.

Then I took the test and it looks like I put the Capitol K in CRAZY.
I can't really be crazier than silk, sadie and the MoP can I?

So I figured I would ask the Advice Bunny.

I says to the Advice Bunny: "Mr. Advice Bunny I'm not crazier than silk, sadie and the MoP am I?"
Mr. Advice Bunny replies: "No. Definately not. So says the all-knowing advice bunny."

Boy howdy do I feel better, the voices kept telling I wasn't crazy I just needed some additional reinforcement. If you need me I'll be in my padded room wearing this nice white jacket.

By liberal powers of deduction....

Confederate Yankee's post: You Ain't Seen Huffin' Like the Flighty Quinn points out the fallacy of the allowing ultra-liberals in the media. She's tried to read between the lines and find things that just aren't there and got caught with her hand in the cookie jar.

Beth Quinn of Middletown, New York's Times Herald-Record recently put her mega-liberal powers of deduction to work in an editorial named Proof is in the memo: Soldiers died for a lie and claims that "Bush had already decided to attack. It also says Bush knew there were no WMDs in Iraq, but that 'the facts were being fixed around the policy.'" Beth demands a confession from President Bush and helps stops just short of offering to provide an outlet for al-Qa'ida's members to vent their sexual frustration.*

As I read Beth's editorial I became infatuated with the powers of deduction granted her via her ultra-liberal world views. With powers of deduction such as these it's no wonder the "reality based community" is looking to impeach President Bush, I mean Sherlock Holmes doesn't hold a candle to Beth Quinn. As I pondered these powers over several adult beverages (Gin and Tonic to be exact) I started to realize how her powers of deduction work and put them to the test.

Lets list the facts:
Beth Quinn is a feminine name, so we figure she's female.
She appears to be a female (her headshot is on The Herald's web site).
The tone of her article is accusatory and demanding, considered masculine characteristics.
She's wearing a red shirt (I've never been a big fan of red clothes).

Thus I've deduced that Beth actually has (insert drum roll) Klinefelter's syndrome. Yes ladies and gentlemen, instead of your typical XY (male) or XX (female) chromosomal makeup Beth's chromosomal composition is that of XXY. Resulting in chesticles with a six-incher below the belt. It seems our darling of not-so-journalistic integrity is actually a hermaphrodite.

Sure I have absolutely no basis for this conclusion other than the powers of deduction granted to me by consuming mass quantities of Gin. Which seem to be the same powers of deduction she used to determine President Bush lied and calling for Secretary Rumsfeld to be charged as a war criminal.

I know 'tis alarming .... the powers of thinking like a liberal are only a half gallon away.

Note: This entire post is a poor attempt a humor. Well mostly.
* She really didn't offer her services to Al Qa'ida's members