John Kerry supports the troops

Like a jockstrap filled with Icy-Hot.

Note: The link above has nothing to do with jockstraps or Icy-Hot, well except for maybe wishing we could strap one on Johnny-boy.

Posted by phin at 10:43 PM on October 31, 2006 | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Big Trouble in North Korea

Hot Air is calling for the manipulation of Kim Jong Il and if it weren't him being in control of what we presume to be a formidable arsenal his his cravings for attention and adoration would be laughable.

Well he's still laughable, just a bit on the scary side too.


Once we get our hands on him,
Kim Jong Il will break under our unlawful torture techniques.

Posted by phin at 05:14 PM on October 09, 2006 | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Keeping up with Amerikkka

I appears some of the Dutch have decided to create political party even the Kennedy family wouldn't want to be part of.

Oh well, at least the ACLU will always have a home in The Netherlands.

Posted by phin at 10:35 PM on May 30, 2006 | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Elections 2008 - Idolized (The Democratic Primaries)

With the most recent "American Idol" receiving some 63 Million votes a couple of things dawned on me. First, we've reached a sad state of affairs in America when a game show draws more interest in voting than presidential elections. Secondly, perhaps we could spark some political interest if political elections were setup in a similar format. Imagine the possibilities:

Announcer: And now we have Democratic Presidential hopeful John "My wife's really a man" Kerry.

John Kerry: Thank you ladies and gentlemen, and thank you America. For my first song I'd like to kick it Old School. Going back to my roots as a soldier and peace activist, I'll be singing War originally performed by Edwin Starr back in the early 70's. Sure I personally don't remember too much about the 70's, or the 80's or 90's for that matter, but when I heard the song on Xena: Warrior Princess it spoke to me on so many levels.

... John Kerry sings a rendition of War that bears an eerie resemblance to of the sounds of wombats mating...

Simon: That had to be the single most atrocious sound I've ever heard. And believe me I've heard some horrid sounds, like the time Paula and Randy were back stage having a threesome with that midget stripper who'd left my dressing room just thirty minutes prior. That's right you nasty freaks, you were getting my hand-me-downs. But back to you John, that was truly horrendous, I'm hoping some deranged fan will strangle you in the parking lot to keep me from having to endure your nasally voice ever again.

Paula: Wow, that was amazing, just beautiful, almost as beautiful as you are John. You know the name John reminds me of my days as a "working girl". I'd never understood why we called our clients John's, I never had many clients named John, I did have a couple of visits from a guy named Bill and another named Al though. Speaking of "working girls", I've never really understood why the word "working" was used, I mean really we're just doing what we really enjoy.

Simon: Damn, won't she ever shut up?

Paula: That's just a mean, mean thing to say Simon. John, you did a wonderful job, maybe a bit more work could be done, I mean I wasn't really "feeling" it. It seemed as if you weren't really into the theme. Like maybe you had been in the past, but you'd changed your mind or something.

Randy: Yo, Yo, Yo. John man, you totally rocked and by rocked I mean sucked. I was contemplating jamming this pen into my ear, but then decided that it'd be hard to get the blood outta this bad ass shirt I'm wearing, so in the end I jammed out to mah boy Kanye West's latest single, How I be taken Whitey's money and keepin' in real, on my iPod, now that's some dope rhyming. Maybe next time you could bust a rap move, show the audience how you're keeping it real with the minorities.

Announcer: Up next we have Democratic Nominee John Edwards...

Fade to black...

Tune in next week for another exciting episode of American President

Posted by phin at 09:37 PM on May 25, 2006 | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Attention in the class

Norma, who I am now dead to because of my mother's day tribute left the following comment on my post about immigration yesterday:

Well, trickle down this. Using a family with 6 children calculate the education costs in your community, and the medical costs, and figure they're not paying taxes except on consumer items. Add to that the prison costs for the gangs, the uninsured motorists, the cost of returning a couple million a year to Mexico, the cost of infectious diseases spreading that many of our doctors have never even seen. Now multiply that by about 4 or 5 million families. Yes, they cost us much more than we benefit from low wages. But even if we did benefit, why would you want a permanent underclass?

I won't bore y'all with the calculations she mentioned, the Center for Immigration Studies says immigration (note legal and illegal were combined) costs $11 billion to $22 billion per year. Close enough for government work. Pretty expensive, until you start to consider the benefits they bring our economy.

I won't go into the reduced labor rates immigrant workers are providing for construction and agricultural businesses.

How much of their pay is being poured back into the US Economy? I can't find the numbers, granted I haven't looked very hard, but I'll bet you a dollar it's more than the costs of immigration CIS mentions. Hell lets say of the eleven million illegals half of them are spending ten thousand dollars a year in our stores. Maybe I'm wrong, but I calculate it out to be $55 Billion dollars, more than double the high estimates for the costs of immigration.

Next topic. Why would I want a permanent subclass? Me, I'd personally love a utopian society, were everybody is equal and we all gather around the camp fire every night hold hands and sing kum-ba-ya, but it ain't gonna happen. Each and every society has had and will continue to have upper, middle and lower classes, you're only fooling yourself if you don't believe so. The difference is in America you don't have to stay in one class or another, check out Paris Hilton, she's as low class as they come and she has money.

To think we don't already have a "subclass" is pure idiocy. Don't believe me, go back and watch the footage flowing out of New Orleans after Katrina struck, or take a nice leisurely stroll through Compton or one of the other LA 'burbs.

Funny how the compassionate conservatives are concerned for the well being of immigrants while they aren't pushing ways to get rid of those abusing the welfare system isn't it? I'm all for bringing in immigrants to do the jobs Americans won't. At least they're willing to work, sure I'm paying to subsidize their health care and education, but at least I'm seeing some return on my investment through affordable housing and cheaper groceries and at least I'm not afraid to admit it.

Posted by phin at 10:33 PM on May 17, 2006 | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Peaches

For the second time in as many weeks I've heard someone claim that illegal immigrants are costing us more than they're bringing into our economy. That the burden they're putting on our health care and judicial systems outweigh any benefits they're providing to our economy.

I just can't and don't buy it. The impact of their reduced labor trickles though every facet of our economy, from the fruits and vegetables we're buying to the homes we're living in. Labor by an immigrant, probably illegal, had something to do with bringing the cheap produce to your table and building the roof over that table. How anybody can say these costs are less than the health care and services our government is providing is beyond me.

Think just for a minute of the effects that deporting every immigrant would have on our economy. Costs of produce would triple or quadruple, if fresh fruits and vegetables were available and not rotting in the fields. The cost of new homes would sky rocket, some people I've talked could easily see the cost doubling, if it didn't triple. So as the costs of essential goods and services start to increase at a exponential rate our pay, for those of us lucky enough to stay employed, will stay relatively the same. You think the stories, that's all they really are any more isn't it, of the Great Depression were rough the economists I've talked to say this wouldn't even compare.

President Bush and his staff seem to understand the effects, and they're being crucified for it.

I don't feel amnesty is the answer, but I think it's a far better alternative to firing up the cattle cars and going along with mass deportation.

I've heard several people call for the documentation of guest workers. Make sure they've got their papers signed and that they're here legally and contributing to the social services they're receiving by paying taxes. There's a problem with this mindset. Depending on their "native" country there's a pretty good chance that their income taxes won't go to our government, but to the coffers that line their government's pockets. Why do you think so many actors, actresses and other multimillionaires have claimed dual (primary) residency in countries without an income tax?

With the processes, laws and treaties currently in place documenting the illegals roaming our countryside will increase our "Manuel" labor costs by at least 30% (a combination of the employee and employer contributions to the tax system). Now ole Manuel can't get by on a 20 -30% pay cut, so he'll either duck the system (like he's currently doing) or he'll find some where willing to cover his salary demands. This pay raise will will inevitably be passed on to us the consumers. I'm not sure about the rest of you, but I sure as hell can't afford a 30% POST tax pay cut.

I'm not saying things shouldn't be changed, they should. I'm just not sure how to go about it. Perhaps we need to rework the treaties or create a guest worker program with reduced contributions for the employer and employee. There isn't a need for the worker to pay into a retirement system they won't be benefiting from and with increased tracking / documentation of immigrants we can ensure that they aren't able to abuse the system.

The only thing I'm sure of sweeping changes to our immigration and border security issues are required. These problems didn't pop up over night and expecting several thousand troops patrolling the border to solve the problem is wishful thinking at best. The troops, since they won't have any official law enforcement capabilities, could be better utilized in Alabama, Mississippi and Louisiana, where we still haven't recovered from the 2005 hurricane season. If they want to send folks to the border, increase the immigration department's budget and hire more people with the authority to do something and put them on the border.

Placing ten-thousand National Guardsmen on the border to sit by and watch, since they don't and won't have law enforcement capabilities, is a waste to tax dollars and asinine. These folks would be better of sitting at home, at least then we wouldn't have to be concerned for their well being and the extra strain it's placing on their families.

Nothing we do, short of digging a moat or building the next great wall (that we'll tear down in twenty years), will have an affect on the influx of immigrants until some type of arrangement is made with the companies hiring them. Whether it's enforcing our current laws or stiffening the penalties we're sure to fail if we follow the current trend of non-compliance. It's the old "if you build it they will come" adage in full effect. As long as employers are willing to hire illegal aliens with little or no retaliation from out government for their misdeeds we'll continue to have an influx of illegals, especially when they receive pay that is equal to or greater than a weeks pay for just a couple hours of work.

We need real reform and change. I'd like to think our elected officials would have learned from their $100 gas refund stunt and realize that the American public isn't easily fooled. Regretfully, with people applauding purely symbolic actions as a "great start", the phinlet's generation will still be dealing with the problem of illegal immigration. Me I like my cheap fruits, cheap vegetables and I like my affordable housing. I'd also like to be free from the threats that a porous border brings with it. If you're going to combine the two issues nothing short of world domination there isn't simple, unmessy, solution. By separating the two, deal first with border security, then with immigration reform, as two separate issues, then we might be able to get something done.
I'm interested to hear what President Bush has to say tonight. Perhaps he'll find a way to convince the extremists on both sides of the issue, that refuse to see a middle ground, that there is a better way. But I wouldn't hold my breath.

In any event let's hope he doesn't go screwing with the cost of peaches.

Posted by phin at 05:49 PM on May 15, 2006 | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Questions unanswered

Recently several discussions around the water-cooler have been political in nature, primarily geared towards illegal immigration, dealing with Mexicans primarily. This is a topic I haven't really weighed in on, and probably won't much now, but there were some questions I asked that they didn't have answers for and didn't really want to think much about.

Part of the debate has to do with immigrants putting a strain on our infrastructure; while they don't contribute anything since they aren't paying taxes. I'll readily admit there is a burden being placed on Hospitals since illegal immigrants will head to an Emergency Room where they can't be turned away. In the end we're covering these costs with increased medical costs.

I'll also agree that schools are catching hell too since teachers are being asked to teach and speak in both English and Spanish to accommodate students whose parents aren't contributing to the Educational System by paying taxes, well they pay state sales tax, but they aren't paying state and federal income taxes.

Now what I don't get is the national security issue, which is what the knuckleheads here and on the news keep talking about.

From the articles I've read (blogs and magazines) ole Foxy Vince and his Regime do a pretty good job keeping their borders secure. You haven't heard about Mexican Muslims going on the rampage have you? (Come to think of it how many Mexicans do you know of with the name Abdul, Muhammad or Ahab? Not very many I guess). Now the primary reason Sweet Vinnie keeps the border secure is economic. The Mexican Government, if you can call it that, doesn't want those pesky Guatemalans, Hondurasseans and Belizeans sneaking across their country into the U.S. of A. and stealing their jobs.

If the Mexican officials are as "dirty" as they're made out to be and they have ties to the drug cartels, well they aren't going to stand for their clients getting blowed up, by explosives. Just like a Pimp ensures the safety of his Ho's a dealer is going to make sure his clients are well taken care of. Sure the Mexican dealers might take some cash to smuggle Abdul and Ahkmed into the country, but they never promised to keep him in one piece.

Now here's where the proverbial shit hits the fan.

We don't have to worry too much about Mexican collaboration with Islamofacionists. They aren't going to do a damned thing that interferes with cash that Pedro can ship back to the motherland.

If safety is a major concern why isn't there a movement to build a wall between the US and Canada (Not that I'm advocating this. I love my Canadian Readers, eh.)? Or better yet, a moat, with Crocodiles and Hippopotamooses (the cold-weather version of the Hippopotamus).

Last time I checked there wasn't a movement to bring Sharia (Sharī'ah, Shari'a, Shariah or Syariah) Courts to Mexico.

Just take a stroll through lovely, and I do mean that, downtown Ontario Toronto. You'll be surprised by the number of people of Middle Eastern lineage you see hither, there and yon. I'm also certain that a vast majority of them aren't planning on flying planes into the hi-rise buildings, but it only takes a couple, or a boat headed across one of the great lakes.

Sure that's a lot like racial profiling, but last time I checked the folks we're fighting against in the War on Terror weren't Mexicans, their native language isn't Spanish and their names damn sure weren't Pedro, Juan and Manuel.

So yeah, I'll buy the Health Care and Educational System strains as a reason to do something about illegal immigration, but save the War on Terror reasoning for somebody who doesn't know where the most of the Muslims in North America are located. If you're still wondering here's a hint they aren't eating tamales and re-fried beans.

Note : I realized after reading this again and after a couple of e-mail exchanges with WB (who's left a ton of great information in the comments that isn't being brought to light in the debates) that I'd missed a the main point I was trying to get across.

The point being that we need to secure our border with Mexico, and perhaps take over the Baja Peninsula (we need more vacation spots), but that we also need to pay close attention to our northern borders as well. I haven't seen the first politician mention, other than in passing, that we need to ensure terrorists aren't freely about freely.

Be sure read the comments, otherwise you'll miss some great information, and me admitting that I'm a knucklehead.

Posted by phin at 03:06 PM on April 25, 2006 | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Dude where's my oil?

I was having a rather polite conversation with one of the locals here in town when the conversation turned ugly. Seems he's a pink-o commie conspiracy theorist and doesn't really mind sharing his philosophies, no mater how off base or wrong they are.

There we were having a nice conversation about the weather, fishing (to my readers within striking distance of eastern NC Shad and Rock are running) and life in general when the conversation took a turn for the worse. He managed to switch over to the war in Iraq, Afghanistan and September 11th.

Most notably he kept citing the work, if you want to call it that, of Charlie Sheen, Ma Cindy and several Websites (I'm betting the DU and Daily Kos). First of, if you start citing celebrities as your sources of knowledge you're in trouble, more so if it's one of the Sheenlings that you're quoting.

Now if that wasn't bad enough he kept going on 'bout how the war is being fought over oil. Keeping the prices down so competitive alternatives aren't developed, allowing Bush and Company to continue to rake in their profits. When he hit that talking point I stopped him and asked him to step outside for a minute, where I showed him the going price for a gallon of gas.

Where's my cheap oil? I asked.

For some reason he didn't have a response.

Posted by phin at 02:20 PM on April 05, 2006 | Comments (5) | TrackBack

The master plan

I'm surprised nobody else has figured out that this is actually part of the Grand Reverend of MuNuviana Pixy Misa's master plot to take over the Al Gore's interweb.

It would be much easier for him to wrangle control from the EU / UN, since their ineptness and willing to surrender is only eclipsed by the French.

If I turn up missing it's because I know too much...

Tip of the bowler to:Phoenix and Robbo

Posted by phin at 11:45 AM on October 07, 2005 | Comments (0) | TrackBack

The first daughters

The recent picture below of Chelsea is spreading across in the internet and blogidohexiweb faster than crabs in a sorority house. Progressives are pointing out that Chelsea is now an attractive young woman.


I see your president's daughter.
And....


I raise you twins:


Sure looks aren't everything, the wingnuts got the moonbats out numbered too!

Posted by phin at 03:00 PM on July 30, 2005 | Comments (6) | TrackBack

The WaPo strikes again...

The Roberts just can't get anything right, at least in the minds words of the moonbats extraordinaire. The demonizing of the Roberts family has begun " ...Jack -- having freed himself from the controlling grip of his mother -- enjoying a moment in the spotlight...". But that's about as cognitive a thought as Robin Givhan was able to choke out in her article that is reminiscent of notes passed between prepubescent girls in grade school.

The topic of her post: SCOTUS Nominee John Roberts' family and their attire. The picture of the Roberts family and President Bush is captioned with "Even the clothes are conservative". Ah yes the old tactic of when in doubt attack the person....'s family....'s clothes.

If the best the Liberal Media's crack staff of reports is able to come up with is slander of apparel then there shouldn't be any problem getting John Roberts approved.

Hat Tip: trying to grok

Posted by phin at 10:00 AM on July 25, 2005 | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Why we're fighting....

For those who wonder why we are still in Afghanistan it's to ensure the villages filled with honorable people, like this village that saved the life of a Navy SEAL, don't fall victim to the Taliban once again.

I'm surprised after the recent attacks against our brethren in London that people are forgetting these words: "all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness". If you are sure where they came from; they're from the United States of America's Declaration of Independence (full version here).

Maybe I'm reading too much into it; however I feel that all people regardless of their geographical location are entitled to these rights. War isn't pretty, it never has been. Unless we win the war on terror and spread democracy world wide we will never be able to return to our way of life prior to September 11th, 2001. I am thankful everyday that we have an administration in office with the same view and the gumption to continue the spread of democracy.

It's only been eight days since we celebrated our Independence, shouldn't everyone have the opportunity to do the same?

Hat Tip: INDC Journal

Posted by phin at 02:40 PM on July 12, 2005 | Comments (0) | TrackBack

A wakeup call from hell

I woke this morning to the news that the Secret Group of al Qaeda's Jihad in Europe had claimed responsibility for the blasts in London this morning.

If there have ever been any doubts as to why we must not end the war on terror until we have eradicated it this should remove them.

If those on the far left calling for a withdrawal date from Afghanistan and Iraq want to know why we'll stay until the job is done this is why.

Our kinsman in England have stood beside us in the war on terror, let us now get down in the trenches and pull them back up in their time of need. They were here for us when we were attacked on in our homes, now the time has come for us to return the favor.

We can not allow anyone to allow bestow the blame upon us for this attack as we continue to fight the war on terror and we can ill afford to allow our kinsman in the war on terror to follow in the footsteps of those who have buckled under the demands of terrorists.

If you needed a reminder as to why we're fighting the war on terror, you just got it. We can not afford to to allow those who have died to die in vain.

Posted by phin at 09:00 AM on July 07, 2005 | Comments (6) | TrackBack

The unanimous Declaration

IN CONGRESS, JULY 4, 1776
The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America


Click to Enlarge

I've wondered at times if our forefathers knew the greatness we would achieve and trials and tribulations our nation would undergo in the years since they signed our Declaration of Independence. In our brief history our country has defended itself from all attackers emerging as a stronger more united nation.

There are and always have been those who feel the country should be in heading in a different direction. Only through healthy debate are we able to learn and grow and see all sides of the issues at hand. These different perspectives have allowed our great nation to grow and prosper as the world changes around us and as we change the world. However there are times when it is necessary for us to put our differences aside and take care of the task at hand.

By putting our differences aside we have liberated countries.
By putting our differences aside we have delivered entire continents from the grasp of evil.
By putting our differences aside we have become and shall remain a super power for the world to respect and rely on.

This Fourth of July as you spend time with your friends and family please take a couple of minutes to reflect and say thanks to the sacrifices others have made for our way of life. Take the time to thank someone in our armed forces for protecting our way of life and for helping to spread democracy world wide. Take the time to reflect on what it truly means to be an American.

May all of you have a happy and safe Fourth of July.

Cross posted at Confederate Yankee

Posted by phin at 08:30 AM on July 02, 2005 | Comments (0) | TrackBack

I had hoped....

I had hoped when I read this pass weekend's headlines calling Iran's President-elect Mahmoud Ahmadinejad a moderate that they were true. I had hoped that this was the beginning of the end of the Extremist Islamic rule of Iran. My hopes however crumbled as soon as I opened the articles and learned who the President-elect was. This article on Fox News points out that Mahmoud Ahmadinejad may have been one of the captors that held 52 Americans hostage in 1979. It seems my hopes for a moderate Islamic leadership in Iran will have to wait.

Hopefully we are able to avoid going to war with Iran, however if we are unable to avoid war I hope and pray it is based off an actual threat of nuclear weapons and not a rampant fear of Islamic governments. Yes I realize the terrorists that flew used planes as missiles on September 11th were all Muslims. However I also have friends who are Muslims, who are as appalled as I was at the attacks that took place on September 11th 2001 and the continuing attacks taking place today. We've discussed philosophical view points and theirs aren't that different from mine. Which is why we need to ensure that all of Islam isn't tarnished and its followers aren't billed as the dregs of society.

Now before you get all hot under the collar and jump into the comments section and start riddling off the various times throughout history Muslims have attacked folks I want you to think about this. How many people were killed during the crusades? How many people were forcefully converted to Christianity during the inquisitions? How long ago was it that there wasn't a moderate Christianity? Think back to the Salem witch trials. How many people were burned at the stake for being heretics?

ALL the major religions have changed. We can not continue that path of judging an entire religion by the acts of a few extremist. If we continue the trend of attributing the actions of the extremes to the group as a whole we end up with a very narrow view of the world and the people in it. Don't follow?

You've voted democrat in the past 16 years, well you must be a pot smoking anti-war troop hating hippy.

Your relatives are from the Middle East? Well we'd best not allow you to ride on public transportation; you may decide to follow the path of your countrymen and blow it up.

You went to church last Sunday, well how's your buddy Eric Rudolph doing? Remind me not to be within a couple of city blocks of the clinic when you're in town okay?

Think these assumptions are off the wall and baseless? You're damned right they are. But they're no more off the wall and baseless than judging 1.4 billion people based off the actions of a fraction of a percent of the population. What would happen if the world's view of Christianity and Americans in general were based of the actions of the Westboro Baptist Church, statistically speaking it's about the same.

I had hoped we'd learned something since the days of burning witches at the stake during the Salem witch trials. However it seems we've only changed our definition of a witch and the locations where we're hunting.

Posted by phin at 10:30 PM on June 30, 2005 | Comments (1)

Raging RINO's

Not really being a fan of the Extreme Right, and definitely not being a fan of the Extreme Left I've wondered aimlessly around the blodidodehexiwebisphere searching for a group of politically like minded bloggers.

Today, thanks to The Politburo Diktat my search has come to an end and I'm joining up with the Raging RINO's.

What the hell's a RINO you may be asking. Some folks like to think it stands for a Republican In Name Only. Somebody who someone who is a Republican, but still expand governmental control while limiting personal freedom's.

The Commissar describes a RINO as Conservative who might not want to drink the Party Kool-Aid on every single issue (ESCR, Schiavo, small government, fiscal responsibility, senatorial compromises, free markets/trade, pandering to Creationists, etc.). Thus there's a new TTLB Community.

Steve-O the LLama Butcher clarified what RINO stands for by the way. That would be Republicans wIth eNormous gOnads if you're too lazy to click over.

Posted by phin at 02:23 PM on June 22, 2005 | Comments (1)

An explanation of torture

Whilst I'm on the topic people in persistent vegetative states the jackass over at Kos (no I won't link there) has come out and said "The torture that was so bad under Saddam, is EQUALLY bad under U.S. command."

Once again today a fellow MuNuvian says it better than I could: Rusty has details and explains just what torture is.

** Ths photos are graphic folks so don't click over if you're eating lunch, breakfast or dinner. **

Posted by phin at 02:24 PM on June 16, 2005 | Comments (0)

Hillary for Senate!

Those of you think I've finally lost it may be right, but my supporting the Hateful Shrew's senate bid has nothing to do with me being certifiable.

According to Fox News:

The majority of New York voters said Hillary Rodham Clinton deserves to be re-elected to the Senate next year, but want her to pledge to serve a full, six-year term if she runs, a statewide poll reported Thursday.

New York voters may not be as dumb as previously thought. Maybe they're actually willing to take one for the team. What ever their logic, if it can be called that, is I damn sure appreciate it.

I agree, this is a great idea. Let’s help minimize the damage that would be caused by Hillary in the Whitehouse by keeping her in the Senate. Sure the best alternative would be for her to give up politics, but folks that just ain’t gonna happen.

There for I’m all for Hillary in ’06 as long as she agrees to serve her full six year term.

Posted by phin at 02:02 PM on May 05, 2005 | Comments (0)

The next pope

The lefties have spoken; we simply can not allow Pope Benedict XVI to rule the Catholic Church with an Iron fist. We mustn't allow the world's Catholics to suffer under Pope Benedict XVI's rule, think of all the innocents who will be subject to catholic indoctrination if we allow Pope Benedict XVI to be head of the Catholic Churh. Just what were the cardinals thinking?

From the Left's analysis of the Iraq Quagmire we all know the War in Iraq cannot be won; via The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler "Now, the warbloggers, who are fuzzy on the details of the actual war, like to believe that we're winning in Iraq. They're about the only ones who do."

Fear not though, I have a solution. Since America is in dire need of a Military Victory, lest we be shamed in front of the rest of the world and loose our Super Power Status, we should invade the Vatican. Actually we can't just invade the Vatican; we must erase any semblance of its existence. Sure I know what you're saying it'd be sacrilegious; but when faced by being shamed by France (they said we’d never win the war against Iraq you know) what’s a little sacrilege?

Face it, President Bush isn’t going to waste a Nuke on the Moon, and we have all these spares laying around. So why not nuke the Vatican?

Sure there’s the whole Italy really hasn’t done anything to us either mindset; but they have. We didn’t complete the hit on that Communist Hussy Giuliana Sgrena and they're going to figure it out soon; so technically we’d be killing two birds with one stone. Okay maybe more than two birds, but when you think about it has anything good ever really come out of Italy?

Finally we must have an exit strategy. What are we going to do once we've removed the power of the Catholic Church from the Vatican? We can ill afford to follow the precedent set in Germany and Iraq where American troops must remain present for even one day after the battle is over. Well really it wouldn’t be a battle since we’d just be dropping a bomb or a dozen; but you get my point. We shall move the center of the Catholic Church to San Francisco and follow through on Susan Estrich’s petition to the Vatican to do away with that ruffian Benedict XVI and appoint a female pope instead.

Just remember kids, when they launch the missles you heard it here first. Now I understand why being a hate filled lefty is so easy, you see a problem you pick a solution and run with it.

Posted by phin at 09:15 AM on April 25, 2005 | Comments (0)